SEVENTH SON (Movie) Review

I’m not going to try and make this out to be as bad as the critics say it is, however, it wasn’t great.

Basically, there was a lot of bad casting in Seventh Son.  It’s hard enough to see Julianne Moore as the evil witch, but what makes it worse is the casting of Jeff Bridges as Master Gregory, the knight who fights off evil, or in this case, witches.

seventh-son-jeff-bridges-as-spook-master-gregory

I mean, have you seen the trailers and TV spots?  Jeff Bridges is already hard enough to understand nowadays, but now he has to play an old Spook, as his warrior title is called, who mumbles, too.  And, I believe his character is supposed to be some hardened warrior who has humorous moments, thus humorous lines.  But really, he was neither hardened nor funny when it called for it.  He may have tried to act it, but honestly, I just don’t think the role was for him.  However, I can’t say the script was all that great either.

seventh-son-julianne-moore-as-mother-malkin

Then you have Julianne Moore playing the evil witch who’s wrath was heightened because she had her heart broken.  A woman scorned, probably easy enough to handle. But a witch scorned… oh no, send out the Spook!  The end is nigh!  So, yeah, she has a vendetta, and she wants to- oh, I don’t know- destroy the world.  Rule the world?  Who knows, because it doesn’t seem like she has a specific plan in mind.  Just killing, I guess.  Maybe it was specified, but if it was, I must’ve missed that well thought out plan.

Julianne can play the evil beauty okay, but again, casting her as this two-dimensional character just didn’t seem to fit.  It’s like casting Eddie Redmayne as an evil-ruler type– oh (yeah, I’m not sure if I’ll be seeing Jupiter Ascending anytime soon).  Anyway, again, there was nothing scary about her character, except maybe some of her eye makeup near the end of the film.  Sorry, not sorry.

seventh-son-kit-harington-as-mr-bradley

As for Jon Snow- er- I mean hot guy Kit Harington’s character.  He’s less “sad face” in his role, but maybe that’s why it’s so brief.  Aww…

Luckily another hot guy comes into play, as he’s supposed to replace Jon Snow’s character. Ben Barnes is the seventh son of the seventh son, which, again, you may have been clued in on by the trailers.  Yes, he’s the Spook’s apprentice, and he’s supposed to be this already semi-trained boy.  But, he’s not.  And thus he kinda stumbles around with Spooky Dude, learning and training how to be this witch killer.  Until a pretty witch comes his way, and now he’s too smitten to want to kill her when he has his chances.  Yes, he has more than one chance.  Aw, true love.

seventh-son-ben-barnes-as-tom-ward

Of course, she loves him, too, even though they’d only met twice before declaring it.  Oh well, as Marianne said to Eleanor in Sense & Sensibility, sometimes it can take 10 years, sometimes 10 seconds, to find “twoo wuv”… or something like that.

There are other actors, but really no one to get excited about, which is kind of sad.  Not even the good-but-bad-looking creature named Tusk was all that loveable.

Anyway, the point is, the story is pretty by-the-numbers.  There are some fights throughout, some chuckles, some nice fantasy-land scenery of Vancouver, British Columbia, and some pretty effects.

Unfortunately, there is nothing that makes this stand out.  With the mis-casting and the boring script, it just didn’t flow well enough.  And that’s why I can only go as far to say that it’s a good movie to watch while you’re multitasking.  Not quite worth seeing in the theaters, and definitely not worth seeing in IMAX 3D.

My rating: C-  

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